Just got back from a ride. It was terrible. Every fear that I had ever had about riding happened tonight.
Let’s start at the beginning. Starting off, I couldn’t get my foot into my right pedal (something had bent on it). Well, anyone who rides knows that to fall to the right is a big no-no, so I instead threw myself to the left. Oof, that didn’t end well. Oh well, no worries, just get up and get back on.
I’ll spare you the play by play but a quick rundown of the events: Run off the road by a car (turns out wealthy people only like people on bikes if they are 7 and on the sidewalk), funny sound coming from the tires, sort of like they were rubbing against something. Kept on going. Even after a motorcyclist thought it was be hilarious to cut me off and laugh his ass off. Up creeps the tension headache, something I was sure only cubicles and bad dates could incite. Cut off by a car. And the straw that broke the cyclists back: a car full of men who yelled at me and opened the door near me, lunging in my direction, in an obvious attempt to frighten me. It worked.
Tears streaming down my face, I turned for home. Only to have a car turn right in front of me (I was even in the bike lane!). I am not a quitter, and at this point I feel like a complete failure. I love riding at night. There is nothing like being in the city when it is quiet and still and cool. I have never felt unsafe, until tonight. What will I do if I can’t ride at night? How am I going to give up the dream of using my car as my main form of transportation?
As I rode home (up the big hill by the house), I changed gears as I started going downhill…and popped my chain. At this point, I want nothing more than to be at home in my little apartment.
I am always one to step up to a challenge (which is both my strength and greatest weakness). I don’t want to be afraid to ride. All of these happenings made all my feelings of vulnerability and failure come rushing back. If not for this contest, would I give up? I don’t know. Would I let my bike sit in the garage for a week or so? Probably.
Not now. Now I am going to figure out how to fix my chain, what is wrong with my tires, fix my pedals and get back on. Not only for the competition, but for myself. Ok-I also hate to lose. Or give up. So I won’t. Will I still ride at night? Most likely, although I may ride with a friend more often!
As for the title, as I was riding home, after the gentleman so lovingly said hello but before the car incident, I found myself singing “Somebody to Love” by Queen. So, thanks Freddie. I owe you one.
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6 comments:
You know what? You were out riding, training, and getting some exercise. That's more than 99% of the population around here. I admire you. Keep up the good work!!!!!
what was up with yesterday? torrential downpours during my run, lots of meanies (yeah, i said it) and technical issues during your ride ... these forces will not master us! we will persevere! (that was a weird pep talk ... i'd make a terrible coach.)
anytime you need a crew to ride with just holler. most nights there is at least one of the brocycle guys out. once you get comfortable you should start carrying a mini u lock to wield as a weapon. that is the main reason i bought it.
A-thanks. I may just do that. I am still trying to figure out the whole U-lock thing (like everything else!), but that is a great idea. I thought about Mace as well. Or a gun (only sort of joking).
what is WITH people? seriously. a-holes. those guys in the car deserved some serious junk punching.
me me call me!! i was riding last night too - transporting myself to knitting group. i would run with carrie but my manifesto includes a section on how running is the bane of my existence, and there's no way in hell i'm getting up at 5 to go swimming with amanda, but i'll ride with you any night of the week.
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